Friday, March 30, 2012

Boyfriend and Popcorn and Spoons, Oh My!


YAY it’s Friday!! Unfortunately I’m not having my normal Friday date, because Boyfriend is taking his kids to the Grand Canyon for a week. Remember my fears when Boyfriend went on a business trip? I have a feeling I’m going to be having some more of those this week.

Last weekend Awhile ago, Boyfriend and I decided to make some popcorn and watch a movie. And I somehow convinced him (because he likes to humor me) to try my eating-popcorn-with-a-spoon method. Don’t believe me? Look:

Red is his. 
It went kind of like this:




Don’t believe me? Well, Boyfriend agreed to be interviewed about it! As usual, my comments are in red.

1. Did you REALLY try a popcorn spoon?
 Yes, I really did try to eat popcorn with a stupid spoon.  "Try" being the operative word. [I told you guys!!]

2. Why'd you try it?
Gia said it was cool and I'll try anything once.  50% off sushi, dirty manchez, Glee.... [UH. You’re kidding about the dirty manchez honey…right? RIGHT?!]

3. On a scale of 1 to 10, one being awesome and ten being OMGSUPERAMAZINGAWESOME, how do you rate it?

Eating popcorn with a spoon is, how can I say this delicately..... fucking ridiculous!  One of the most fruitless, annoying things I've ever done.  And that counts trying to pleasure Gia with a ping-pong paddle. [That didn’t happen.]  I love trying to scoop one kernel at a time into my mouth.  So satisfying! [It lasts longer that way!]

4. What did you think of it?
You're kidding, right?

5. It couldn't have been that bad, right?
Remember the Sucker Punch incident?  It was up there, except for the blood.  I'd rather watch "Midnight in Paris" and "Horrible Bosses," back to back. [Exaggerator.]

6. I thought you said Gia was smart. How did she come up with such a bad idea?

I was wrong.  She's a moron.  How about you lay off the goopy fake butter and just reach your hand (with the nifty opposable thumbs that were hard won over millions of year of evolution) into the freakin' bowl and then shovel it into your mouth?  Hmmm?  How about we save the spoon for soup or applesauce?  Now, good day, Sir! [What I’m hearing is, we need bigger spoons. Got it.]

Needless to say, Boyfriend won’t be trying that again anytime soon… Anyone else try it? How’d it go?

47 comments:

  1. Maybe a popcorn ladle? At first I thought you misspelled "Dirty Sanchez" then I made the mistake of looking it up. Why does a dirty sanchez need to be escalated to a manchez? WHY?
    If he's taking his kids to the Grand Canyon, what do you have to worry about? It's not like the Grand Canyon is this irresistible pussy farm. No zombie sluts there. No worries.
    Great to hear from Boyfriend as always. Dude's hilarious.

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    1. I did the EXACT SAME THING with dirty manchez. Ooof.

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  2. Although you know man with kids...could send signals to the ladies. No it will be fine Pickleope is right, you should relax with wine and popcorn!

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  3. So, when it comes to the ping-pong paddle, how would you rate your experience?

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  4. You're insane, and just so's ya know, 50% off sushi is not your friend... : )

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  5. I'm going to introduce the kids to popcorn spoons on Family Movie Night - then maybe their snack will last through the previews so I can get a decent nap in before they start whispering and elbowing each other.

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  6. Ahhh such a lovely interview! Blog-wise, it's much better that Boyfriend didn't like the spoon experience - if he had enjoyed it, the interview wouldn't have been half as fun.

    And I still haven't tried it - but I'm still not so into popcorn so probably won't any time soon. However, as far as my imagination runs, I don't think I would like it very much either.

    Popcorn is warm food, not always actual temperature, but in feeling. And spoons are definitely cold... if the popcorn were warm enough to heat the spoon (like when you're eating soup) then I could see how it would work. But that doesn't happen. So instead, you mouth meets warm popcorn sitting on a cold spoon... ugh! Not good.

    I'm impressed with my own genius in this response.

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  7. I just slather every piece of popcorn with loads of butter. That way I can just dunk my hand in the bowl and all the popcorn just sticks to it. It's how you eat like a gentleman.

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  8. I sometimes eat popcorn with a spoon. Your fingers don't get all buttery that way.

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  9. Blogger seems to be cooperating again - so I'll give this feedback another shot!

    Ahhh such a lovely interview! Blog-wise, it's much better that Boyfriend didn't like the spoon experience - if he had enjoyed it, the interview wouldn't have been half as fun.

    And I still haven't tried it - but I'm still not so into popcorn so probably won't any time soon. However, as far as my imagination runs, I don't think I would like it very much either.

    Popcorn is warm food, not always actual temperature, but in feeling. And spoons are definitely cold... if the popcorn were warm enough to heat the spoon (like when you're eating soup) then I could see how it would work. But that doesn't happen. So instead, you mouth meets warm popcorn sitting on a cold spoon... ugh! Not good.

    I'm impressed with my own genius in this response.

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  10. What you guys need is a really good blender. Just blend up that popcorn/butter mixture into a spoon-friendly slurry, and everybody wins!

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  11. Also, the Grand Canyon itself is a slut. I mean, it's a GIANT LOOSE CANYON. It must be full of sluts and also potential Manchezers!

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  12. I'm a popcorn shoveler. I must boycott the spoon. As for the grand canyon, unless he's got a thing for cacti and rocks, you should be okay.

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  13. I must say.. I just don't see the benefit of eating popcorn with a spoon. However, there are endless benefits to eating popcorn doused in hot sauce. endless..

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    1. AMEN. I am a hot-sauce-on-popcorn fiend! SO GOOD.

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  14. I'm trying ever so hard to suppress the urge to look up dirty manchez and 50% off sushi. I know I will not win this battle.

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  15. Popcorn and a spoon...never. Popcorn and nutella...maybe.

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  16. Hysterical! I'm glad Super Earthling led me to you. I can't wait to read more. : )

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  17. I sorry about Boyfriend going away for a week. You'll be ok! Just get bigger spoons and loads of popcorn. Yum!!

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  18. What was the idea behind the paddle? (hahahhahha) It's a pun, get it? Behind? Paddle? All right. It's not funny. But you only have to entertain yourself this week, and I have to entertain myself all the time.

    Love,
    Janie

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  19. I'm trying this the next time I have popcorn, which will most likely be at a movie theater. The other movie-goers can just deal.

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  20. I don't know what Dirty Manchez is and I'm going to keep it that way. :P

    Maybe if you had bigger spoons for eating popcorn? Or a ladle?

    -Barb the French Bean

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  21. I am betting you can talk him in to doing it with a spork instead. They're far more stabby!

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  22. I just discovered your blog, thanks to Super Earthling's latest post extravaganza. Your cartoons are totally fun. I don't think I could eat popcorn with a spoon as I prefer the "gorging mouth crammed full just shy of choking method" for eating most food but especially popcorn. I am sorta crazy but VERY manic about getting things done in a hurry. I really have no idea why I haven't won "competative food" contests...well short of the fact I haven't actually entered any.

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  23. Oh my god ding dong you have to use huge spoons not regular spoons.

    Or do it my face and just face-dive into the bowl and take whatever gets crammed into your face. Delightful!

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  24. Eating popcorn with a spoon sounds as silly to me as eating soup with a fork. Most of each one of your bites will wind up back in the bowl.

    As a popcorn aficionado, I've come to prefer eating the buttery yellow stuff with one hand while occasionally using a partially damp napkin to wipe off the excess oil.

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  25. I am with your boyfriend on this one. It just means more dishes to wash, and my delicate hands can't take that.

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  26. "What I'm hearing is, we need bigger spoons."

    Haaaaaaassa! That's pure awesomeness right there!

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  27. I have never heard of eating popcorn with a spoon. It is meant to be shoveled into your mouth absentmindedly until you feel sick. I can't believe you don't know that, Gia. Were you raised in a barn? (Albeit, a barn stacked with an unending supply of cutlery.)

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  28. I could see how eating popcorn with a spoon could get pretty messy!

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  29. Forget the boyfriend thing. Marry him!
    Haha - it was the ping pong paddle that got me!

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  30. I'm trying to decide if "eating popcorn with a spoon" is perhaps a double entendre for something much more risque. I'm quite sure the ping pong incident only confirms this. However it is quite possible you really just meant eating popcorn with a spoon. I have never tried this b/c I usually choke to death on popcorn. I envy the popcorn eaters!! Those darn kernels always get stuck in my teeth or choke me!!

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  31. See, now I HAVE to try eating popcorn with a spoon, even though I already know it will end up all over the floor. You make a good case (and anything is better eaten with a spoon). Besides, I already eat my ice cream with those stupid wooden coffee sticks, even through they break every time. This will be an improvement. ;)

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  32. Maybe just a spray thAt tastes like popcorn? No spoons or hands to wash :)

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  33. Better than trying to eat popcorn with a straw. Although you CAN drink wine with a straw. Furthermore, if you have enough wine, screw the popcorn (well, not literally, those kernels can get pretty scratchy. So I've heard).

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  34. I hardly EVER eat ANYTHING with my hands (it's the germaphobia thing). I absolutely CANNOT stand getting anything on my hands. Instead of napkins, I use washcloths. They get more of the yuck off and don't tear from my incessant wiping. Pizza? Fork and knife. Anything that I MUST eat with my hands that might make a mess on them (Popcorn, french fries, burgers/subs, etc.) I use gloves. No joke, gloves. Like the kind doctors wear. You can buy them at any CVS or, if you're like me, and you need them in bulk you can buy em at Sam's Club or Costco. But just to try it, and save a glove, I'm gonna eat popcorn with a spoon. Just to try it.

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  35. Seriously, he could have just said, "bigger spoon, please." You deserve an award for your patience.

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  36. Very funny site! I definitely have my quota of "naughty words" for my Christian eyes for the year. :-) I love Boyfriend's facial hair - is that stubble or a full on beard, or is it a short curly beard? I must know. I think making my children eat popcorn with a spoon would give me plenty of time to take a well-deserved steaming bubble bath, that long needed nap, and still have time to watch one of my Rutger Hauer movies. Hmm, not a bad idea...

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  37. Oh my. A spoon? really? Seems impossible and ridiculous.

    Thanks for the laughs.

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  38. I think I'm with BF on this one...a spoon just seems too fiddly

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  39. A spoon sounds way to normal - you should use chopsticks!

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  40. This boyfriend of yours -- we would get along quite well.

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  41. My popcorn eating method is to stick my face into the bowl and see how many kernels I can get to stick to my tongue at once. Lots of popcorn in my face and no buttery fingers. A win/win!!

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  42. Bahahahahaaaa I loved this. I make The Chef make me a little side bowl of popcorn because he eats his too fast, I also got him to try and eat scrunched up chips with a spoon, I got a similar response!

    Love Elle xo

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  43. Yeah I don't blame him for not liking the spoon technique. :P

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  44. Who drinks red wine with popcorn? Everyone knows popcorn / white wine! Nothing better for dinner

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